Category: Nigerian Jokes

Nigeria Joke: Goodluck Jonathan on February Election

January 16, 2015 | By | 1 Comment

Nigeria President, Goodluck Jonathan, was campaigning for the February 2015 Election in one State. As soon as he mounted the podium to speak, people started chanting ‘you have failed!’ ‘You have failed!’. Disturbed, Goodluck Jonathan stopped speaking and said: ‘Everywhere I go, people say I have failed. Everywhere I go, people say I’ve failed. Now, […]

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Nigeria Joke: Three Politicians

November 27, 2014 | By | Add a Comment

Three prominent politicians in Nigeria boarded the same flight to from Abuja to Lagos. The first Politician started, “I can throw one N1000 note down and make one person laugh.” “I can make two persons laugh with just two N500 notes.” the second politician replied. The third politician retorted, “With just five pieces of N200 […]

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Nigerian Churches in 2030

November 10, 2014 | By | Add a Comment

Below is how Nigerian Churches will become in 2030: PASTOR: Praise the Lord. CONGREGATION: Halleluyah! PASTOR: Can we please turn our iPads and Kindle Bibles to Exodus 20:1. When you’re done, kindly switch on your Bluetooth to receive the sermon… Please have your debit cards ready as we shall now collect tithes and offering. You […]

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Nigerian Joke: The forest

March 24, 2014 | By | Add a Comment

An Igbo man, a Yoruba man and an Hausa man were lost in a forest and then captured by cannibals. The king of the cannibals told the prisoners that they could live if they pass a trial. The first step was to go deep into the forest and get ten pieces of the same kind […]

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Strike notice from Boyfriends Association Of Nigeria To Girlfriends

December 3, 2013 | By | 2 Comments

From: The Boyfriends Association Of Nigeria To Girlfriends With regards to the meeting held today, the Boyfriend Association of Nigeria decided to go on a two months strike starting from 1st December, 2013. This strike is not to cause any riot or any form of breakup with our beloved girlfriends. We plan to use this […]

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Nigerian Joke: Who is a Muslim here?

November 29, 2013 | By | 5 Comments

A man entered a mosque carrying a brand new smooth machette and asked “Who is a muslim here?” The whole mosque went as silent as a grave yard. The man asked again, “How can a full mosque have no muslim?”. No one replied. The man then grabs the nearby young man and goes out with […]

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Nigerian Joke: I love you, sweetheart

November 27, 2013 | By | 1 Comment

A group of men gathered at a church conference on how to live in a loving relationship with their wives. The men were asked, “How many of you love your wife ?” All the men raised their hands. Then they were asked, “When was the last time you told your wife you love her ?” […]

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Nigerian joke: Business associates

November 27, 2013 | By | Add a Comment

Three business associates, an Igbo man, a Yoruba man and a Chinese man, went to eat lunch together at a restaurant in Surulere. While in the middle of their meal, a fly came in through the window. It flew across the table to where the Igbo man was but he just waved his hands to […]

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Nigerian Joke: Who is more intelligent?

September 13, 2013 | By | 3 Comments

Jonathan met with the Queen of England. He asked her: JONATHAN: How do you run such an efficient government? Are there any tips u can give to me? I want to help Nigeria. “Well,” said the Queen, “the most important thing is to surround yourself with intelligent people.” Jonathan frowned, and then asked,”But how do […]

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Nigerian Joke: First night experiences

August 14, 2013 | By | 2 Comments

A mum was lucky enough to see her three daughters wed in the same year, so she whispered to each of them “After your weddings, text me your first night experience and don’t forget to text it in a coded way!” After a week, the first daughter sent ‘NESCAFE’ in an sms 2 her mum […]

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Nigerian Joke: The Power of English

August 13, 2013 | By | Add a Comment

A professor drove into a petrol station in his sleek state of the art range rover sports to buy fuel. Professor: Guy abeg, give me full tank. Fuel Attendant: Sir, I don’t speak pidgin. I only speak English. Professor: Ok! Good morning. I currently feel a profound desire to replenish the propelling of my motorized […]

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Nigerian Joke: What English can do!

August 13, 2013 | By | 1 Comment

A newly married Nigerian couple brought a female house help from the village to assist in keeping their home tidy, so they would have time for their careers and other more important things. One day, Oga decided to give his wife a surprise package. He moulded a big heart (to represent love) with the assistance […]

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Joke: Funny Updates

July 12, 2013 | By | 1 Comment

Some updates fit kill person: “To hair is human to forgive is design” “I hate guys with low selves of steam” “You are a blessing to your generator” “I am a soccer for guys with six park”. “My BB charger is no longer walking” “Anybody who supports this killings is a carnival” “Be magnified Oh […]

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Funny Joke: Ten sins committed on Facebook

July 2, 2013 | By | Add a Comment

1. You buy some cheap underwear at a Bend- Down- Select under market& on facebook you write:”I love Gucci underwears” *God is watching you* 2. You’re a married man with 2 kids & on facebook you always claim to be single *God is watching you* 3. You’re 21 yrs old & you’re dating a man […]

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