Akpos’ Pastor called him after Church and asked him how much he bought his iphone 6 smartphone. Akpos lied that he bought the phone for $100 instead of $1000, because he didn’t want the Pastor to shout and ask how much he (Akpos) gave to God that month. All of a sudden, the Pastor gave Akpos two […]
“There was a robbery at Akpos’ neighbour’s house and he called 199 Next thing he heard was: Welcome to Nigeria Police Emergency Center, for English press 1, for Igbo press 2, for Yoruba press 3, for Hausa press 4, Akpos pressed 1, and another voice came u.. For car accident press 1,for armed robbery press […]
Akpos was on his way back home early one morning when he came across robbers. They got hold of him. He struggled and struggled but they overpowered him. When they searched him and found only a torn $5 note on him. The following dialogue ensued. Robbers: (Angrily) You have only $5 on you, so why […]
Akpos went to Church on Sunday and gave testimony that he was infected with Ebola and that God had healed him. When he finished, he tried to give the microphone to the second man who was waiting to give his own testimony, but the man refused to take it: The following conversation ensued: 2nd man […]
The following conversation ensued between Akpos and his wife: Wife: Our maid is pregnant….Akpos: That’s her problemWife: Neighbours are talking…Akpos: That’s their problem..Wife: I’m worriedAkpos: That’s your problemWife: They say it’s yoursAkpos: That’s my problem..!!!
Akpos attended a church service one Sunday. While the pastor was preaching he said, “Tell the person seated next to you that what happens to you will also happen to me.” But unfortunately for Akpos, he seated next to a cripple. So Akpos replied the cripple, “What happens to you will remain with you!”.
Akpos is ill and goes to the doctor and describes his illness… AKPOS: Doctor, I am always feeling weak. DOCTOR: (gives him a medicine) You must always take four tea-spoonful of this medicine before every meal. AKPOS: Ok Doctor, but there is one problem. DOCTOR: What’s the problem? AKPOS: I have only three spoons at […]
Akpos was abducted by kidnappers and taken to an unknown location. The kidnappers beat him for a while and asked him, “Which of your family members should we call to pay the ransom.” A surprised Akpos replied: “I don’t have a family now. All my family members ran away after I was suddenly bugged down with fever, intense […]
One afternoon, Akpos arrived home with sad news for his wife. Akpos: Wife, I just received a call, mother (mama) passed away. Shall we go to town and get some necessities for the funeral? Please write a list and then we can go. Wife: A list won’t be necessary; we’ll just get 2 cabbages & […]
Akpos, a pharmacist was working in the late afternoon when a young man walked in and asked to buy a condom. When Akpos dispensed the condom, he asked whether the customer knew how to use it. He said no. After Akpos had patiently explained to the young man how to use the condom, he shook […]
Akpos went to the American Embassy for a student visa, and the process of his interview with the white lady went this way White Lady: what are you going to the USA for? Akpos: To study. White Lady: Which city, school and which course do you wish to study? Akpos: Chicago, Economics and Statistics. These […]
When Akpos was studying law at the University College of London, a white professor, whose last name was Peters, disliked him intensely and always displayed prejudice and animosity towards him. Also, because Akpos never lowered his head when addressing him as he expected, there were always “arguments” and confrontations. One day, Mr. Peters was having […]
Akpos, a bank manager, held a meeting with his staff because some news had been delivered from the company headquarters. The following conversation ensued: Akpos: There is bad news and good news from the HQ. Which one will you listen to at first? Staff: (After deliberating for a while) The bad news first. Akpos: You […]
One day, a Akpos thought up a brilliant idea and went to talk to his son Akpos: I want you to marry a girl of my choice. Son: No. Akpos: The girl is Bill Gates’ daughter. Son: OK! Akpos goes to Bill Gates: Akpos: I want your daughter to marry my son. Bill Gates: No […]